At around noon thirty my aunt and I hailed a cab to get to the Pyramids, and in this cab I experienced yet another episode of culture shock: the cab was an independent, looked like a crappy toy car, and had no seat belts. Twice we got pulled over, once (we're guessing) because the cabbie didn't set the meter and then because he had driven out of the boundaries for independent cab drivers, where normally a government official would take over (Egypt has a major theft problem in tourism, which is obviously a large income-producing industry for them). It's nerve-racking (but definitely adrenaline-inducing) being told to stop in who-knows-where completely surrounded by maniacal Egyptian traffic (I liken it to Indian traffic) with not only cars, but also teenage boys riding donkey carts full of who-knows-what; also, the language barrier between the two bickering men didn't provide much assistance to understanding the situation, and the disgusting scenery that is Egyptian apartments wasn't too comforting. BUT, it was something I will never forget. In the words of my aunt, "You can't make this stuff up."
So two traffic tickets later, we felt pity toward the cabbie and decided to buy him some KFC :-). He was grateful.
Almost at the pyramids we were stopped AGAIN by a man wearing all denim and looking suave. He and the cabbie began to argue over something-er-other, and it being the third time around of bickering I was beginning to think that this was typical communication for Egyptians. But what turned it around was that the man decided to join us in the cab. At this point my aunt started to get a strange look on her face because she was sensing a scam brewing up.
Looking at my aunt, "Madame, where are you going? Are you American?"
"The Pyramids and the Sphinx, and yes."
"'Give me back my silver.' Ah, the Pyramids and Sphinkes? I tell you what, I take you on special tour for good price. We take camel or carriage ride, you choose."
(Keep in mind that my aunt is a New Yorker, born and raised; she and my dad are probably the reason for my potty mouth) My aunt replied, "No no no, you're gonna take us somewhere remote and make us pay $100 or you won't let us go. We're not gonna fall for that bullshit!"
"But madame..."
Somehow we ended up at some remote sandy "alley" close to the Pyramids but no cigar. "HELL no, we want to go to the entrance of the Pyramids. Take us to the entrance."
"But madame, this is the entrance. I take you both on private tour on camel and inside Pyramid. Then we see Sphinkes and we take picture of you on camel."
"NO! TAKE US TO THE ENTRANCE OF THE FUCKING PYRAMIDS!" This went on for a good five minutes.
He then looked at me, "Miss, would you like private tour?'
"No."
"TAKE US TO THE ENTRANCE!" So the cabbie backed out of the "alley" and took us to the entrance. Persistence, persistence.
Again, you can't make this up...
We got our tickets to enter, stepped through the sensors, and made our merry way...and goodness gracious, it was amazing! Pyramids, pyramids, pyramids! Full of pyramids and people. And speaking of people, one thing to know about children in these foreign countries is that even THEY know how to pickpocket. They say, "HEL-lo, eshuse me, can you take picture?" And when you're fiddling around with the camera and being distracted by some of them, another will slip a hand into your purse and take anything of high value. So you can believe me when I say that anytime a group of children approached us like a swarm of locusts I would run off while keeping my hands over my pockets. It's hard to appreciate historical landmarks when people are trying to rob you. I wanted to put on my New York face to tell them (and any other thief/scam/vendor) to fuck off, but I remember my aunt telling me something along the lines of, "No no, since it's not New York, they would actually take that personally."
"They were shouting at you, Holly. They think you're pretty."
"Oh, how nice of them."
"Well it is, but they think you're a whore because you're American." Oh, how nice. THAT would explain the part when a vendor invaded my privacy by attempting to stick some tourism shit down the front of my jacket.
Anyway, Camel Guy and another man on camelback had followed us the entire time. So after trying to get a good look at the Pyramids we took them up on the camel ride.
Not even three minutes into the ride my aunt freaked out on the camel, and the men tried calming her down because she was arousing fear and anger out of the camel. Camel noises aren't too attractive. A couple more minutes my aunt suggested I get off the camel so as to not be taken to a remote area. I got off, she paid them "20 and 20" plus a generous tip, and we started for the Sphinkes on foot. The men began calling for us saying we didn't pay enough.
"YOU SAID 20 AND 20, AND I GAVE YOU 20 AND 20!"
"Madame..."
"20 AND 20! 20 AND 20!" Persistence, persistence.
The Sphinkes was AMAZING, but after a few we were somewhat interrupted by...a sandstorm. Not making this up. A sandstorm in the middle east! My hair turned to straw! Everyone, tourists and citizens, began moseying their way (backwards) toward the exit, and my aunt and I regretted not being equipped with veils to cover our faces.
We took an official government cab back to the hotel. During the ride back, the cabbie lit up a cigarette, and I suffocated the whole way back.
To end the day, a few hours ago my aunt surprised me with...(drum roll)...a Japanese dinner with two GORGEOUS Italian men she had met before my arrival in Cairo. I kid you not. Two charming, authentic Italian men, one the age of 22 and the other 32, both engineers. Both I believe, according to my understanding of their bippity boppity, have been "here since Deshember but will not let me feeneesh." The younger one works in a factory and the other trains Egyptians in...tile laying? Something like that. Anyway, the older one asked for my contact information in case he visits LA and wants a tour. I told him what we have in LA is no Pyramid or Leaning Tower of Pisa, but sure. It was a wonderful ending to an insane but riveting day in Egypt.
